X-MEN First Class:The STiXXclusive Review

THIS REVIEW IS SO BIG I NEEDED A MOTHERFUCKING TITLE PAGE!! THAT’S HOW DOPE IT IS! I APOLOGIZE IN ADVANCE FOR THE EXCESSIVE AMOUNT OF ALL CAPS IN THIS REVIEW, BUT AFTER WATCHING X-MEN: FIRST CLASS, THIS IS THE ONLY VOICE THAT I HAVE IN MY HEAD! LOUD, POSSIBLY ANNOYING, AND JUST MOTHERFUCKING ESTATIC!!

Okay, let me tone it down a notch *heavy breaths*

I WOULD FIRST LIKE TO GIVE A STIXXCLUSIVE HONOUR OF APPRECIATION TO MARVEL STUDIOS AND MATTHEW VAUGHN FOR PRODUCING AND DIRECTING (respectively) ARGUABLY THE GREATEST MOVIE ADAPTATION OF A COMIC BOOK SERIES OF ALL TIME! YES, I SAID ALLL TIME!!

Now a lot of the readers right now are probably trying to turn down the voice in their heads because of the all caps, but I swear to you, this is no boost. You don’t even have to LIKE X-Men *cough* Nikki *cough* to see this movie. If you know and understand the general concept that is X-Men and a few characters, YOU’RE GOOD TO GO! This movie had the elegance of editing, the BRILLIANCE of directing, and ANY OTHER positive synonym that you can throw in there to best emphasize to MAGNITUDE of which this movie ENTERTAINED, stimulated all emotions, AND captured the audience all at the same time, NEVER getting boring at any point. Yes, you have your talkative points, but at the same time, that builds the story, and the story FLOWED SO SEAMLESSLY, it was like watching a pianist compose a SYMPHONY; PURE ART!

This movie was a prequel to the first X Men movie that debuted in the year 2000 (11 years for a prequel? Hot damn).  It, thoroughly and exceptionally, explained the who, what, when, why, and how the X-Men started, tracing back to the childhoods of Charles Xavier (Professor X) & Erik Lehnsherr (Magneto). I don’t want to give too much away, but you know how people say “the trailers show the best parts and ruin the movie?”….THE BEST PARTS WEREN’T EVEN ALL IN THE TRAILER! I CAN’T EVEN POINT OUT THE “BEST PART!” THERE’S TOO MANY TO EVEN COMPREHEND AND FATHOM AS TO WHICH PART WAS MORE SUPERIOR THAN THE OTHER! THAT’S THE TYPE OF BRILLIANCE THAT WAS DEFINED IN FRONT OF MY EYES JUST AN HOUR AGO! (Mind you, I watched this movie after 10pm on Friday, and I am typing this going into 1am on Saturday)

The raw emotion that the actors display as they tap into rage, fear, anxiety, rage (I said that already, but I had to emphasize that), and MIND YOU, this was all set in the 60s, so the JFK references, and how they tied in the ‘Bay of Pigs’ major incident involving the U.S but tying it in with the Soviet Union? UGH!! AMAZING! I’m flabbergasted as I type this. I shit you not, readers. THIS MOVIE ENTERTAINS! If you LEAVE THE AUDITORIUM THINKING THAT THIS MOVIE WAS LESS THAN GREAT, YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT GREAT IS! YOU SINCERELY, TRUTHFULLY, HONESTLY, DO NOT! I FULLLLLLLLLLLY WITH THE MOST ALL CAPS I CAN PUT, FULLY! RECOMMEND…no….I DEMAND, URGE, ORDER, PUSH, EVERYTHING THAT REQUIRES A FORCE IN MOMENTUM, I PLEAD AND BEG YOU TO SEE THIS MOVIE! IT IS TOO GOOD TO BOOTLEG! GO WATCH IT IN A THEATRE, SPEND THE MONEY, YOU WILL GET ALL OF YOUR MONEY’S WORTH AND WAYYYYY MORE THAN SOME!

I’ve only seen 1 movie TWICE in a theatre: Inception. X-MEN FIRST CLASS might be there first movie I see in the theatres 3 TIMES!! MAYBE EVEN MORE! IT’S THAT AMAZING, AND EVERYTHING ABOUT IT I RESPECT AND ADMIRE TO THE MOST HIGH!!

This is my review, my outpour of admiration, my opinion…

THAT’S MY WORD & IT STiXX